Baby Shower Presents I Should Have Been Given

We've all probably been to baby showers and probably been guilty of giving cute, but tiny and totally impractical babygro's and bootees and all that kind of gorgeous-but-totally-impractical gifts. Now that I am a mother, and have a full 8 weeks of experience under my belt, I'll tell you what gifts I would have liked to receive.

1. Rescue Remedy. Lots of it. Not only is it good for calming you down, but you can give it to The Kid as well. For baby, dilute with a little water and administer with a medicine dropper or syringe. In about 15minutes he will be sleeping soundly. I felt like a Bad Mommy the first time gave it to My Kid, after he'd been crying for an eternity and showed no sign of relenting. I even hid it from Luke at first, thinking I was committing the cardinal sin of Drugging Your Baby. But no, the nurse at the Baby Clinic says you can give it to babies EVERY DAY! (cue joyful jumping).

2. NUK dummies. Or any other orthodontist approved pacificer. Dont think you're going to be the super-parent who doesnt allow his/her child to have a dummy. It might be a problem in a few years time, getting him off the dummy, but that's a problem to worry about in a few years time. What you need to worry about now is shutting up that crying baby, before you throw him in the bin. It's a good idea to have more than one, because they get misplaced easily, and then Kid gets distraught and doesn't stop crying, parents get distraught, scream at each other and someone lands up sleeping on the couch. Trust me, I know.

3. Scented nappy bags. If you bottle feed, these are a must. Breast fed babies dont make smelly ka-kas but bottle fed babies can be so bad you gag on the smell. Wet garbage on a hot day might smell better than what comes out your kid's ass. So block your nose, clean the smelly bum and dispose of the nappy in the scented bag. Granted the scent of the scented bag itself is not marvellous, but anything beas the smell of freshly pushed putty in the morning.

4. Telament Colic Drops

5. Mag Phos tablets (Tissue Salts No8)

6. Bennetts Colic Mixture

The above all assist in winding your baby. No longer do you have to rub away the top layer of skin on your baby's back trying to wind him. This is how it works:

1 Mag Phos tablet

12 Telament drops

5ml water

Dissolve the tablet and drops in the water and administer before each feed.

The Bennetts mixture gets given to The Kid at the 2pm feed (1.5ml) and then for the next two feed after that. It prevents The Evening Baby Grumps. (your kid crying his face off for no reason) Just do not exceed 5ml per 24 hours.

7.Calpol/Stopyn/Panado Syrup. For pain and fever. Excellent stuff. Also sleep inducing. Excellent stuff. Will admit to having used it when he had no pain/fever. Will at least say it prevented him much pain. If I had to listen to much more of that crying, I'd have flushed him down the toilet.

8. A decent, comfortable baby sling/carrier/papoose. There will be times when you have things to do around the house, but the baby just wont want to be put down. Will get whiny if you put him down or leave him on his own. Never fear. Strap him on and carry on with what you need to do. This gift will also come in handy when there's no space in the car for the pram.

9. Microwave bottle steriliser. These are not expensive, but save you a world of time and trouble. Grandparents were babysitting The Kid, and Granny put the bottles and dummies on the stovetop to sterilise the old-fashioned boiling way, forgot about them, and boiled them into a useless lump of plastic. With a microwave steriliser, it works with steam, you set the timer on the microwave and there is no chance of melting the bottles. There's also no hassling with sterilising fluid/solution. And it takes 5 minutes in the microwave. Bliss.

10. Babycare Book. Stop listening to other people's advice. And advise you they will. Whether or not you ask. Ignore there interfering advice, as such advice has a tendency to annoy the crap out of you. Instead, look everything up in your handy baby guide. But bear in mind, what is suggested in this book is guidelines. Not serious hardfast rules. Feel free to ignore these too if you so wish.

So next time you go to a baby shower, keep these suggestions in mind. The mommy-to-be might not understand the value of your gift at the time, but will thank you every time she uses it. And uses it well.