Yeehah!!! It’s An Angel Double Feature On TBMB!

Part 1

What 3 things do you do, as a mother that goes against all the books?

Well, since I’m a stickler for the rules (as most of you know) like adhering to movie and PS2 game age restrictions… proper bedtimes, and obeying legal issues like not being allowed in the front seat till you’re 12, always wearing a seatbelt and sticking to the speed limit… there’s not much I do that’s not by the book.
Here are the few I could think of…

1. If he says he’s not hungry, he doesn’t have to eat.
I do not fight with Damien when he says he’s not hungry. I learnt early in his life that he is not a big eater. He’s not fussy- but he goes through phases where he doesn’t eat at all. It used to be a battle. I would serve him some food and we’d sit and he wouldn’t eat. And we’d fight about it because he HAS to eat… doesn’t he? Then I had a revelation and I stopped forcing the issue. One nightmare over with! It’s taken my family a while to get used to it though… he’s the only person I know who can go to a restaurant and not eat simply because he’s not hungry. So instead I make sure there are snacky things like sausages and two-minute noodles and lots of bread and leftovers for in case he decides he wants to eat, or like when he was little I offered him a “Nutrament” or “Ensure” milkshake instead.

2. I shut the door so I don’t have to see the mess.
His bedroom usually looks like a bomb’s hit it. When he was little, I tidied up for him- trying to get him to do it too and help out and get into some kind of habit… but to no avail. So I gave up. Every now and then I did a hectic spring clean when he was away on camp or something, but for the most part I left it. I still do. But he has to take responsibility- if he doesn’t make sure his dirty clothes are in the wash when it gets done then he doesn’t have clean clothes either.

3. He can wear what he wants…
Except for being strict on school uniform requirements- Damien can wear whatever he likes. This often means he goes around looking like a real scruff- and I will ask him occasionally if he doesn’t perhaps want to brush his hair, or wear a different shirt… and I will tell him if it’s a smart sort of occasion and a T-Shirt won’t do, but that’s it. He’s allowed to wear whatever outfit he chooses.

Part 2

What is your opinion on pets - and your children's role in the new family members’ life? AND when do you say NO and HOW do you say NO to hairy and scaly pets without destroying your son’s dreams of becoming a Nature conservationist.

I am one of the few people who do NOT believe that a child NEEDS a pet. I’m sure you’ve all heard people use the totally nonsensical argument that “he really needs to grow up with a dog of his own you know”. I think people who think like that have watched “Old Yeller” or “Lassie” too many times.
The truth is that no matter how old your kidlets are- you are the one who will end up looking after said animal.
Yes you can make it his or her responsibility- but we all know what’s going to happen. Either you’ll be cleaning up hurriedly in the morning so your other half doesn’t step in anything… or you’ll clean up after and feed the animal for the sake of peace because you’ve argued with your offspring for 4 solid days about your agreement that he or she would look after it.
So. How do you not wreck his or her dreams of becoming a game ranger or some such? Let them volunteer their time at a shelter like Wetnose or the SPCA. Organisations like this are always looking for people to help out in some way or another. And the few hours your kidlet then spends with the animals means he doesn’t get bored with the responsibility, they’re making a small difference, and you don’t have to argue with them all the time about whether Rover’s been fed and Felix’s litter-box scooped out.