Count the Bad Mommies

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

He's Just A Teenage Dirtbag

So um... Can you still give your child up for adoption when he's 16 going on 5?
I swear will make up a perfect "profile" for him and write a real sob story as to why I have to give him up- 'coz I just know if I tell the truth no one will take him...
Fucking hell I am so tired of his crap!
AND I have a bladder infection which doesn't help my mood, AND its that time of the month, which doesn't help my mood...
Good grief, you'd think Damien might have learnt to interpret the danger signs by now- even when I tell him I'm PMSing a bit he doesn't seem to get it.

Anyhoodle, he took money out of my wallet yesterday morning, and when I called him on his cell to ask him about it I didn't ask I just told him to bring it back- as this is how I handle Damien when I KNOW he's done something wrong.

So I get home yesterday afternoon and he has again barricaded himself into his bedroom ('coz I took the key away) and he's throwing stuff around and playing music loudly... on MY mini-hi-fi which he has removed from the living room!!!!

AAAAAAARRRRRRGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

He has also chucked all sports of crap out of his room into the passage- including a framed picture of him and I when he was about seven years old- and I know this is SO clearly an attempt to hurt my feelings. So I bang on the door till he hears me and I ask him where my money is.
"Look on the coffee table." he growls, and shuts the door again.
I bang on the door again until he opens it and tell him to put my hi-fi back where it belongs and then I walk away before I throttle him.

I go to the lounge and on the coffee table is a packet of thirty cigarettes and a school notice. I go straight back to Damien's door and bang on it till he opens it.
I say: "Thats not my money Damien."
He grunts back at me with "...didn't you read the note?"
I walk away again before I poke his eyes out.

I go back to the lounge and find the note he has hurriedly scribbled. It reads as follows:




I useD my money anD some of your money To get you this To sHow THat I'm sorry For FinisHing your smokes yesturDay But you proBaBly wont give a FUCK Because I sTole your money But I dont care Im Damien anD I Dont give a FLying Fuck aBouT anyone unless I'm HAPPY!
RIGHT?!
PS: I can't Have Life Science anD C.A.T. THey're BoTH aT tHe same Time I Life. Sci. or C.a.t.



This little missive fills a foolscap page. I have also included his spelling mistakes and and and... I went to him and instructed him to remove the barricade. I then stood looking at him and asked if the note was supposed to be an apology.
He stands there looking at me, and when he's pissed at me he has a way of pursing his lips and biting on his jaw so I just know he's dying to say something to me- and that look on his face makes me wanna smack him one! He says no, its not an apology. Then he has the audacity to complain that my calling him in the morning almost got his phone confiscated because it was during class!!!
Fucking hell... anybody wanna adopt me maybe?
I walked away before I ripped his ears off in fury.
We didn't speak much last night. He spent most of the night throwing things around his room and I spent the night blogging and Skyping.
Were still not really talking this morning because once again- despite his reassurances to me that he was ready for school last night already- his school shirt had mysteriously vanished in the night.
AND my car radio is broken, which resulted in his trying to tell me its not my radio its the speakers, 'coz I'm an idiot and he is all knowing.

10 comments:

Tara said...

Ah to be a teenager again.
Sounds like one awful day in your parenting world :/

ExMi said...

silly of you to forget that the child knows everything and the parent nothing...... ;)

i'm sure damien is surprised you dont fall over more often.

Kerryn said...

Aaah, the joys of motherhood and 'teenagerism'.

I am SO (not) looking forward to those years.

Sweets said...

ok, pack his bags, i'll take him for a week or two to give you a break...

bliksem... ;-)

Nosjunkie said...

he loses that shirt often hey...?

AngelConradie said...

goblin: oh there've been a few of them...

e.m.&c.p.: oh he's very suprised- i can tell by the way he looks at me every morning!

kerryn: "teenagerism", i like that... funny how close it is to "terrorism" eh??!?

sweetass: indeed ;-)

nosjunkie: yip... i'm thinking of setting up cctv coz i swear it possessed!

Writeprocrastinator said...

"Good grief, you'd think Damien might have learnt to interpret the danger signs by now- even when I tell him I'm PMSing a bit he doesn't seem to get it."

Lord help that kid if he doesn't figure that one out before he moves in with his first steady.

And you, hang in there.

AngelConradie said...

writeprocrastinator: teehee... does any guy ever figure them out? thanx dude.

Anonymous said...

I'm sure I couldn't djust his attitude buttttttttttt I'm positive after one week with me hed be begging to get back under your care!!!!
hang in there he's only got a few years before he figures out you were right.
(I was going to say I was him once and look how I turned out butttttttt you might run away!)

AngelConradie said...

s.s.: mwaaaaaaaaaaahahahahaaaaaaaaa
dude- this is my damien we're talking about- many have tried and failed to tame him!