your hair smells of oranges

your hair smells like oranges this evening.
you put your little arms around me and say
'i love you mommy. i sorry i cried when you say no'

i look at you and kiss your head
i mentally jawdrop a little at your sentence construction
we cuddle up on the couch
and watch the most annoying dvd of all time

(kidsongs. parents, just don't buy them. please)

and you love it.
the dumblooking children who you are clearly the bigger star out of
when compared
fascinate you
with their silly songs
and little antics

i don't care that it's giving me a headache.
i don't care that i'm lying in an uncomfortable position.
you don't care that i am tired and haven't showered yet.

all you care about is being on the couch with me.
and all i care about is me being on the couch with you.

and there i am
smelling your gorgeous hair
with your head snuggled under my chin.

when tertia told us about mommy love
i knew it could not be defined.
but this is as close as i can do.

nothing in the world matters
not bills
not deadlines
not how i look
not how i feel
not what i did or did not do today
not how i smiled or grimaced
not that i liked or disliked
not that i could or could not figure something out
not what i did or did not achieve today.

everything in the world that matters
is snuggled under my chin
smelling of oranges.

good night my cam.

x

You Have Future Mail

Dear The Kid,

Today, the day you are opening this letter, will be your 18th birthday. The day I am writing this, it is your 4 month birthday.

I wonder what you will look like - more like me or your father? Blonde with blue eyes or will you have my deep brown eyes? Will you be nerdy and smart like me, or a jock like your father? What will your plans be, for the next phase of your life?

As I sit here now, and watch you sleep, you're a whole 64 cm tall. How tall will you be now? You were probably taller than me by the time you were 7 years old. You weigh 7.4kg today - what will it be in the future?

Will you be a rugby player? A swimmer, like your dad wants you to be? Or a ballerina? (Hey, it's totally your choice). Whatever you choose to do, my boy, I will always support you and love you. There's nothing you could do that could ever make me disown you.

I just want you to know you're the most amazing thing that's ever happened to me. My most perfect creation. The only thing that I've ever done right. And although you weren't exactly planned, I wouldn't change a thing. Except perhaps love you more. If possible.

I look at you every day and marvel at the fact that I actually made you. That I grew you inside me for 40 weeks. That I could feel you moving and growing inside me. I could feel your hiccups, your bumps and jumps. It was amazing.

The first time I saw you I felt things I'd never thought I was capable of. I felt the strongest kind of love imaginable. Only stronger. Looking into your big blue eyes was incredible. Watching you grow and learn new things has been amazing. Hearing your little laughs and your snorts has made it all worthwhile.

My boy, I wish only the best for you. At this point in your life there are only possibilities before you. Your potential is infinite, and where-to-from-here is completely your choice. I hope that we have raised you and given you enough experience, wisdom and independence to make the decision that is right for you.

I dont care if I discourage you from doing something, if you really want to do it. Well then do it. I am your mother and will love you regardless. Dont do something because it makes us happy,do something because it makes you happy. The happier you are, the happier we will be.

And never forget....I'm proud of you.

I love you more than anything else in this world...

Or the next.

Love always,

Mom

xxx

Hello Mommies!

I posted a cry for help over on my blog. Don't worry, it's not as bad as what it sounds at first, but any help from all you great mommies (BMB mommies and loyal reader mommies) will be greatly appreciated.

I know I can count on you!

Heeeeeeere's Damien!

and Angel of course... as per the tag...

1. Post a picture of your kid.

2. Tell us all 3 things we wouldn't know about you.
I never brush my hair
I only shave if I know I’m going to have sex
I love spiders but a flying ant can send me screaming

3. Tell us some things we wouldn't know about your kid.
Damien has watched the X-Files TV series so many times on DVD he can recite almost every episode!
He has watched the Matrix trilogy more times than I can count. He loves certain moves, and DSTV’s Animax... but I have to practically beg him to sit and watch TV with me so I’ve never been able to use it to “keep him busy” (bad mommy style).
Even at almost 17 years old he still loves to build his LEGO.
He never stops drawing- this is SO not an exaggeration...
He has always been a water baby... he’ll swim at the drop of a hat and he’ll bath or shower several times a day if given the opportunity.
He's never slept much... even as a baby.
He's very particular over what he wears and always has been... even when he looks like he just crawled out of a dumpster!

4. What quote/saying best describes the way you feel about being a mommy?
The best thing about being a mom…
Loving this intensely, deeply, unconditionally, madly.
The scariest thing about being a mom…
Loving this intensely, deeply, unconditionally, madly.

5. Who's your Famous Mommy Role Model (haha, like there actually are any good celebrity mommies)
Angelina Jolie of course! She even looks like me!

6. If you could have one wish granted for your kid(s), what would it be?
That he can have the career he wants and like it no matter how much he earns or where he ends up living!

Screw The Water Crisis, My Kid Loves To Bath

When we first got The Kid, we had one of those small baby baths on a stand, that you fill up with a jug, dunk him into and hold onto the slippery little fish so he doesn't wiggle out of your grip. He hated this. In fact it made him scream his face off, so bath time was something that lasted a whole 40 seconds and happened once a week. (Bad mommy, I know)

Then I discovered that you can wash babies in adult sized baths too. And that The Kid adores bathing if his mother is in the bath with him. Then he will play until the water goes cold. He will lie on my belly and kick his legs and spray water everywhere. Still not to keen on getting his face wet, but he's going to have to get used to it.

The only thing with washing him in our bath is that I have to fill it practically to the top in order for him to get wet. But he loves it. He loves flopping around on my chest, blowing bubbles in the bathwater, and being skin-on-skin with mommy is great.

The only time he shrieks again is when I take him out. Oh well.

At least he's clean....