Count the Bad Mommies

Monday, February 4, 2008

Full Marks! I answered first!

1. How is mothering, in reality, different from what you expected it to be?

There is a lot less cuddling and snuggling up to mom than I expected. More like watching this monstrosity who made you fat for nine months grow up and becoming a person in their own right, knowing there is nothing you can do about it.

2. What is something you, as a kid, vowed you would never say to your own kids? Have you kept the vow?

I never wanted to have a child. I have made a promise to never tell her that, but sometimes she tries really hard to get it out of me. So far, I’ve held out.

3. If someone stopped in to your house for a surprise visit, would you be glad for the company, or self-conscious by the condition of your home?

I usually pretend I’m not home. I have those camera thingamjiks at the gate. If you don’t tell me you’re coming over, chances are I’m gonna pretend I’m out. However, even with invited guests, you don’t like sharing the couch with The Pickle’s doll, tough shit.

4. If you had twins tomorrow (boy and a girl) and you got to name them without any input from anyone else, what would you choose?

Bugger, I dunno, possibly some hard-to-pronounce Xhosa name like, Qhamani and Qhayiya.

5. Did you suffer from postnatal depression (this is an awful boring question but I always wonder about this cause I didn't suffer myself)?

No but I did suffer from denial. So I spent a lot of money on baby sitters so I could carry on with my nightly debauchery.

7 comments:

Kerryn said...

Lol, I was in denial the first 5 months of my pregnancy (maybe if I pretend I am not growing a human inside of me, it will go away.)

Me and denial = good friends :-)

Bridget said...

DENIAL - Aint just a river in Egypt hun. Me and denial were pretty great friends too K. Such a stolid companion, not judgmental at all.

sweetass RSA said...

denial and depression two different thinks ya'll... oy... mwhahahahahaha... i was asking about the wrist~gnawing~depression some people claim to get ;-)

angel said...

teehee, denial eh? i think maybe i had the same thing...

BecauseIcan said...

I don't know how to tell you guys but your all nuts...

Just how long can you be in denial for when pregnant?? I can see it now..
"Woman in denial of pregnancy runs around telling people they have to get to gym to work off the extra xmas kilo's... lol and everyone will look at her and wonder if she is aware that all the kilo's she picked up seems to have gathered itself between her boobs and fanny.. Then once the little "bundle of joy" arrives she pretends the attachment dangling from her nipple is a nipple ring...

Thats denial!

B

Bridget said...

Well B,

No, I was in denial about my life not chaning after the baby arrived. I would go out, get drunk, stumble to her cot when she cries and generally behave like an idiot. That kind of denial.

BecauseIcan said...

Aah...apologies for misunderstanding...

The kids have a way of forcing us to except the fact that they are there to stay though..

Mine came out with some Nazi coded schedule I needed to adhere to...

Sounds like she didn't have too tight a schedule for you in the beginning though...

She seems to making up for it now!!

lol

B