Count the Bad Mommies

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Is It Possible to Raise Your Child Without Barney The Purple Paedophile?

I've always hated Barney, and when my step-sister had a kid, and my mother introduced him to Barney to piss her off, I thought it was pretty funny. Until he started demanding Barney all the freaking time.

I've told my mother that if she introduces The Kid to Barney I will never talk to her again (dont know how much of a threat that actually is). I swore all throughout my pregnancy that Barney will not feature in The Kid's life. When I walk past Barney merchandise in the stores I get the heebies. When I read Other Bad Mommies' Blogs I see how Barney has just about broken their last shred of remaining sanity.


Is it possible to keep this vow and avoid Barney? Or he he an inevitable perversion in my life? What effect is he going to have on my child? Is it safe?

I remember, back in high school, one of my friends made up (or heard) a dirty version of Barney, now that's all I hear when I hear the Barney song:

"I love you, you love me,
Barney gave me HIV,
It started with a kiss
And it went to far
All in the back of Barney's car!"

8 comments:

sweetass RSA said...

personally i love barney! but those songs!! my son comes home with the most hideous songs you can imagine, i've told him NO MORE BARNEY SONGS ALLOWED IN THE HOUSE!

telly tubbies rock, try them! lala, po...tinky winky and can't remember the fourth one! LOL

Expensive Mistakes and Cheap Thrills said...

i think i just puked a little bit in my mouth....

sweetass RSA said...

sis man... ok no funny looking furry characters to be discussed again... LOL

tinky winky signing off LOL

phillygirl said...

I'm behind you every step! Banish the Purple Dinosaur to extinction :)

And Tellytubbies ... well I don't have time for them either. I'm hoping by the time I have kids they'll have good old furry friends again like Pooh Bear and Maya the Bee :)

Bridget said...

The Pickle has never even glanced at Barney. I'm blessed! I hate purple. However, her addiction to Dreamworks, Disney and Pixar animated movies is slowly driving me mad!

The Divine Miss M said...

I hate Barney. He is evil.

"I love you, you love me,
Barney gave me HIV,
So I kicked him in the balls
And shot him in the head,
Now that purple perverts dead"

That was our version.
Along with

"I love you, you love me
Homosexuality
People think that we're just friends,
But we're really lesbians"

Actually that one is mildly disturbing!

Avoid the dinosaur! Avoid it! The Kid might not like it if you never put the evil freak on TV ... let's just pray!

Goblin said...

Eish, I remember that song.
I share your hatred of the dinosaur. I cringe everytime I walk into my friends house and see all the Barney crap her daughter has.

I really hope you can avoid it - and whatever other equally annoying character these people can come up with.

angel said...

omg i loathe barney! you know he was only invented so new parents could fit in a quickie while the kidlets were "barney-fied" for a little while?
thank heavens barney and teletubbies and such was after damien's "time" so i never had to go through it myself...